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Monday 12 August 2013

5 Ways to Cover When Your Kid Catches You Having Sex

It's happened to the best of us. We try to be quiet, we hide under the covers, maybe we even lock the door. But somehow our kids catch us having sex anyway
Hello, trauma!
Well, not to fear. You don't need to worry about scarring your children for life. Just have these 5 explanations for what you were doing instead of having sex ready and they should help get you out of a sticky situation if and when you need it.
1. We're wrestling. Depending on the position you're in, this seems like a logical one. You might want to prep your kids in advance by reminding them every now and then when they're wrestling that parents like to wrestle too. Hey, you never know when you're going to need to pull that excuse out of your back pocket.

2. Mommy's getting a horsey ride. Considering how much kids love getting horsey rides, it should come as no surprise to them that Mommy would like them too. You may have a tough time explaining the naked part, but sex can be just as good with your shirt on, so you might want to refrain from going topless if you're worried about an accidental discovery.
3. We're playing hide 'n' seek. This is a helpful explanation if you're enjoying a little oral pleasure. Just make sure that one or both of you are under the covers. Otherwise, you'll have a tough time explaining *that* one, especially when you've been telling them all this time not to be putting anything in their mouths.
4. We're practicing our hugs. Considering the fact that we encourage kids to practice everything else (because it makes perfect, right?), what's so wrong about rehearsing how to hug? We want them to be the best they can be. And by showing them that even parents need to practice things, we're setting a good example. Ha!
5. Just fitting in a little exercise. This is actually not too far from the truth. Sure, you only burn like 300 calories an hour having sex -- and let's be honest, what parent is having sex for that long? -- but you are getting a workout, so I think it's a pretty honest explanation.
Have you ever been caught having sex by your kids? What did you tell them?

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